Artist/woman /mother/grandma

Who am I now?

A couple of weeks ago I became a grandmother. It’s so very remarkable, magical and full of possibilities. A wonder of nature and life itself.

I have taken some time to process a new title/role in my life of grandmother . I recall letting the mother role settle into my body not so many decades ago and now here we are.

We use our labels in introductions.. daughter, wife, partner, mother and now grandmother . Our identity and roles have remained steadfast although fluid as well.

For me post retirement identity as in profession has been shed. A new awareness of self in the world begins to grow .

I have always been an artist. Worked in the helping field as a counsellor and social worker yet remaining an artist at the core. When I became a mother the art took a step back for a time but joyfully resurfaced when my daughter was age 3 and I took a personal leave from the 9-5 world. My role as mother first /artist second was crystal clear.

Now I navigate the world where I am no longer caregiver to other small humans and only my fur and feathered family members . Now that I am no longer beholden to an employer and the huge responsibility of others well being I have time to dedicate to my adult artist self.

The last few years have offered me time to experiment and sort out what next for my creative path. I have put my high octane production and marketing on the back burner. This took me by surprise. I have the luxury of time and good health to work away at what I love. My identity has unfolded over the years. I have had time to concentrate on my own needs for the first time in many years.

The thoughts stir as to the paths that lead to future generations and what and who came before us. It’s no small thing. How were we influenced—How will we influence generations to come ..

A painting by my grandma Winnie -

My two grandmothers were important women in my life. We visited and they visited us and we knew in each moment we were perfect to them . We expected to be hugged and plastered with kisses. I loved my grandparents and each one had an influence on me at points of my life..

Eva -my grandmother (my father’s mother) in younger times

..At my third birthday..My nana gifted me this little table and chairs..

Winnie my mom’s mother -my grandmother (and grandfather Bill)

Just before my baptism with my grandma (Winnie) from Ottawa

Leona my mom as a young woman (my daughter Sam’s grandmother)

It seems there are many junctures in our lives that give us pause to consider who we are in time and place.

Like former periods and life changes I will again find a way to discover this new identity and stage in my life. Currently these beautiful newborns live across the ocean so I will have to find creative ways to reach them over time-and they to me . I hope I can be connected and involved in their lives as they grow . I hope I can be even closer to their mother-and or foster a new kind of relationship . It’s all been very thought provoking and distracting.!(It’s a whole different situation to navigate when one lives so many miles away. ) Just as there are impressions of how mothers should be and behave -it seems the same societal standards creep in to define grandmotherhood. It’s flipped a light for me. Yet..a few stray thoughts..

Thank goodness for an ease in communications with the internet

I continue to have love to share.

Who I am is who I am.

Almost 69 years of forming cannot shift in a moment. I will again learn as I go along..no script . More adventures to come !

Past impressions and current expectations of grandmothering are they relatable? When her twins were born I rather hastily shared with my daughter that I should be called grandma . After I wondered if this title truly suited who I am ?

Then there is the parody and the cartoonish depictions of grandmothers ..My early cultural influences were likely not the best -none representing the conventional!

granny Goodwitch who I thought was a rather appealing grandma /witch -voice played by Ruth Buzzi

Granny from The Beverley Hillbillies

granny The Beverly Hillbillies

grandmama in the Adams family -Blossom Rock

or artist grandmothers :

Grandma Moses shared from WIKiart

I have been a daughter, a mother and now -a grandmother and

and continue to be a woman and an artist.) ;-)

Life offers us many interesting twists and turns ..

I would love to hear how your experience of being a grandparent , great aunt , mentor and or friend of a new mother has either changed or altered your self perception, your time devoted to making art -or your life as an artist. ;-)

Heather