When I was away on a short two night retreat to the City of my birth recently I learned a lot about my visibility. I was able to easily make eye contact and even exchange friendly small talk with members of my tribe ( almost anyone over 60 ) and viewed my past community through a nostalgic lens. This was weekday in the city -and most of the folks wandering about were retired seniors it seemed.
I could freely draw in a cafe without being noticed ..I did not worry about staring at people in public (a habit of mine-people are so very fascinating!)
I try not to be creepy about it. I believe that using our special powers of observation assists us with our ideas and art making.
I enjoy dining on my own or sipping a solitary coffee in a cafe . My mind can wander , my observation skills are on full volume , and I witness what’s around me completely through my own perspective.
While away I felt calm and peaceful on public transport with the knowledge I likely would not be harassed or ogled. I was invisible. I was offered a seat on the crowded bus (bonus) during one journey and felt virtually unnoticed otherwise while on a streetcar or in a cafe drawing,
some of my sketches and a very visible me on a streetcar
When I was in a cafe close to my lodging I captured a moment in time with my note function on my phone . It was early morning and the high school youth were gathering to meet one and other and grab a quick snack or drink before heading off to school nearby. Their energy was a happy buzz and I was charmed by their easy banter with one and other. I did not factor as someone of interest in their social sphere and that was perfectly ok.
My note:
“Today I am invisible. Today I am 68 years old in a coffee shop . My sketchbook is my distraction as are the energized musical voices of teenage youth meeting here prior to their school day. I am invisible. They are deep in their communion with each other. Phones nearby on guard. Yet these boys leaning into each other with something akin to affection. Voices not raised ,squeaking and straining to embrace their manly form occasionally as they do in this time. There is a sweetness about their leaning in. Sporting similar versions of a wedge haircut -is this the fashion now? Have I lost that cultural connection that might bind me to their kind? I steal glances as to not appear like that nutty old lady who stares a bit too long. No worry. I am invisible. The gift and power of observation is now mine . Two girls in another kind of communion. Sharing phone revelations, working on homework together -sweet voices in tandem. Sharing. A tinkling of laughter. Recalling how my own girl friendships offered sanctuary and comic relief from the stressful reality of our days . It’s the same. Thank goodness.”
In early years being an observer was tricky - As a young girl and woman I learned that being aware and cautious of one’s surroundings was necessary for survival . When travelling on the transit or walking at night alone it was important to not be seen as a target or potential victim. I recall taking a woman’s self defense course called Wen-Do to be better prepared for a potential unsavoury encounter. Keys between fingers.
I have not abandoned that sense of looking out for my own safety - and I am sensible while walking alone at night -but I sense less of a threat than in earlier years. (Could it be that I’m invisible ?)
Invisibility as a concept has floated through my life on a few occasions over the years ..
As a child I thought being invisible could be a superpower. I was enamoured with my Classics Illustrated comic book “The invisible Man”
I dreamed up scenarios of what I might be able to do as an invisible child! Imagine the pranks and places you could go without being monitored by adults !
When it was convenient you could simply disappear!
Later in life as I stated to stretch my entrepreneurial legs I had a small business in my community drawing house portraits as gifts for a reasonable fee. Equipped with my b&w polaroid camera I would discreetly take photos of the houses that would be sketched later in pen and ink . (Being invisible would have helped while I sneakily hid behind bushes,cars etc..)
This led me to think about other kinds of self employment I needed to carve out a living locally (I didn’t drive ) and offer a service that most working people could benefit from. My education at that time consisted of fine arts and restaurant work .. I surmised that house cleaning was within my talent toolkit and also figured that most people would simply like their dwelling to be magically cleaned -and to not have to witness the actual process .
I thought my idea was brilliant at the time - and dreamed I would market my service as “The Invisible Maid “ service. I even took steps to design my own logo !
Sadly this business never was launched :- (The reality was I have never really enjoyed cleaning so..)
Sketching through the public library window during a recent local urban sketchers group . No one came by to peak over my shoulder (I think in part to my invisible state)
So I do encourage you if you are an artist who likes to sketch from life and like myself are of the Ageless Artist vintage - Go forward and make art .
Cultivate and celebrate your invisible self publically!
I believe there are more pros than cons while rocking your invisible status !
It has become for me indeed, a superpower.
As an artist and individual of your mature years and wisdom..what are your thoughts about how your visibility influences how you work , live , market your work etc?
Well, I do often like the cloak of invisibililty, it releases one from societal norms and the thought that I must conform and behave as 65 year old women! I wear what I want, create what I want and seek out the company of other "oldsters" who have so much to offer me!
I guess there is a positive side to aging in that it gives us the freedom of invisibility. I miss energy levels and flexibility of the body however!